2005-06-03 - 3:47 p.m.
“What we fail to realize is that by distributing condoms in our schools, we are sending a message that sex between consenting minors is permissible.”
-Doug Focht, Jr.
Centerville Road Church of Christ
So putting condoms in our schools encourages kids to have sex? Does that mean that putting life jackets on boats encourages people to jump overboard?
I bring this up because I heard someone talking about this a few days ago – about how she didn’t want her child seeing condoms at her school and thinking it was ok to have sex. The question I wanted to ask her was “do you really think that if two adolescents want to have sex, the lack of a condom is going to stop them.” Granted, it was a while ago, but the thing that kept me from having sex when I was an adolescent was not a lack of condoms but a lack of girls with the foresight to see what a flaming hot bitch I would become in the coming years. In fact, I think that given the opportunity, the entire papal procession couldn’t have stopped me from having sex.
Seriously – these are teenagers who think of only one thing – SEX! It’s fun – well, actually, back then it wasn’t fun…nobody knew what they were doing and the damn thing was over in thirty seconds. But it was exciting! Jesus, back then holding hands with a girl was exciting! You would get all nervous and try to accidentally brush your hand against hers then grab on and hope she didn’t scream. Granted, the next day when you told your guy friends about it, it was usually exaggerated a little:
“So Nick – what did you do last night?”
”Lucy and I went to the park and things got a little exciting IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN!!!”
Seriously people - how often is it that you think this conversation occurs:
“Bubba – let’s have sex.”
“Sure thing Missy-Lou! That will be so much fu…uh oh...I don’t have a condom. Guess we better go to the library and read instead.”
With kids that age, we shouldn’t be putting little boxes of condoms in our schools – we should have federal employees charged with walking around shoving the damn things into the kids’ hands. Hell, they might as well put them on for them – after all, the first time I kissed Lucy on the cheek, I lost all use of my motor skills and couldn’t remember her name! Perhaps that’s why I never got any farther with her.
